This has been quite possibly one of the most difficult weeks we have ever experienced since my diagnosis almost 13 years ago; honestly, maybe in my entire life. I feel overwhelmed even at the thought of trying to summarize everything that has happened, all that we are currently experiencing, and events that are likely to come. So bear with me as I do my best, and be prepared that this is a lengthy one. Last week I battled very intense fatigue that was out of the norm for what I have previously been experiencing on this chemotherapy regimen. I struggled to make it through each work day and found myself in bed by 6pm each night. When I arrived to chemo last Thursday, I reported my symptoms to my nurse, who could tell I felt lousy. All my nurses usually tease me for immediately busting out my computer and diligently typing, working, and holding meetings throughout my hours in the infusion center. But not last Thursday. They were concerned about my symptoms, and ended up discussing the situation with my oncologist, Dr. F. I suspected my bloodwork would show decreased levels that might account for my symptoms, but the lab values were good. Dr. F. made the decision to hold my treatment anyway and not pile on to what I was experiencing. He said he knows I never complain, I am very in tune to my physical symptoms, and that one week off from chemo would likely do me some good. After experiencing a few other symptoms on Saturday, I started to wonder if I had a virus of some kind. I even took a Covid test on Sunday morning, which turned out to be negative. Shortly after taking that test, my situation took a very scary turn for the worse. I felt nauseous and raced from the living room to the bathroom, but that is the last thing I remember. Thankfully, Mike was home and found me slumped on the floor, where I had vomited. He scooped me up, I started convulsing, and became unresponsive to him. I had experienced a seizure, one of what we now know to be two or potentially three seizures that day. Mike acted quickly to call 911 but I asked him to reach out to Dr. F first to see if we should go to Karmanos downtown, instead of the nearest hospital, so that my medical team and the emergency team could have shared access to my medical records. So that's what we did- headed downtown Detroit to the hospital. I struggled the entire way; retching into a Tupperware bowl, and crying to Mike about how he doesn't deserve this. Through tears and immense fear, I sobbed about how he deserves nothing but a happy life, a healthy wife, one that could make him a proud daddy- not this; anything but this. I prayed out loud - more like begged and pleaded to God, to see us through this and allow everything to be okay. sWhat ensued after arriving at the hospital was nothing short of painful, scary, and heartbreaking and resulted in two days spent in the ER, before a bed opened so I could be admitted. The blur of those days is intense, with countless nurses and doctors, tests, meds, and monitoring...but the end result is serious and significant. An immediate CT scan of my brain showed a mass and substantial swelling surrounding it. A follow up brain MRI nearly 30 hours later to get a more detailed look confirmed our greatest fears. I have been diagnosed with a brain tumor, which is likely metastatic spread from my breast cancer, and the culprit behind my seizures and symptoms. Aside from the obvious fear of losing my life to metastatic breast cancer, the worry about the disease spreading to my brain has been my greatest fear. When breast cancer becomes metastatic (stage IV) it usually spreads to the bone, liver, lungs and brain. Now here we are with three of the four checked off. While I know it is such a miracle I am still here all these years later, it also feels like time has just accelerated exponentially since the progression from my bones to my liver, and now to brain involvement; it terrifies me beyond expression. I am so blessed and abundantly grateful to be surrounded by incredible medical professionals. Between the internal medicine, oncology team and neurosurgery teams downtown, combined with my current medical oncologist and radiation oncologist, I knew I would find some semblance of relief once a plan was devised. Yesterday, the tumor board (a group of doctors and specialists) met to discuss my case and the two best options.
They ended the discussion leaning towards gamma knife, as long as I was okay with that. Gamma knife is a much less invasive, one day outpatient procedure and easier recovery. The goal is to get all of the tumor out but if symptoms potentially arise from more swelling or growth, I will need brain surgery after all to fully remove as much of the tumor as possible. I agreed with the plan to move forward with gamma knife radiation. I am on a slew of medications right now, which are quite frankly, making me feel lousy. The neurosurgeon wants to increase my steroids for the next two weeks to try to get the swelling down as much as possible leading up to gamma knife, which will likely be 11/30 or 12/1. Following the procedure, I will remain on steroids to make sure the swelling isn’t worse, will receive brain MRI's every 3 months, and stay on anti-seizure medications for 6 months. In addition to all of this, I resumed normal chemotherapy today and also received my 3 month heart test to see if my heart function is still good after this intense cardiotoxic chemo. As much as I am honestly feeling pretty horrible right now, I was relieved to receive the chemo that we know has been keeping the bone and liver mets at bay. I pray it continues to work, that my heart is healthy, and that I have not blown through another treatment option. Last but most certainly never least, I want to extend my hugest heartfelt thanks and gratitude to this man pictured here...the only one who could help crack even the smallest smile on my face during such a devastating time. Mike, you are an absolute Godsend and I cannot even imagine where I would be without you. Your love, compassion, empathy, and care knows no bounds and I am forever thankful to have you by my side during all of life's greatest times, but especially during these most challenging ones.
I also owe a huge thank you to my mom for dropping everything to care for our pups and race down to the hospital to be with us. No one flies into momma bear mode to protect her baby like retired nurse, Momma Jan. We also have an enormous army of family and friends who have inundated us with calls, texts, meals, flowers, offers to help with the dogs, and provide any other form of assistance they can. We both feel beyond blessed to be surrounded by so much love and care. I could never get through all of this without you. One day at a time. Love you and thank you for loving me. xoxo, Meg
30 Comments
Kyle
11/16/2023 07:45:42 pm
Something that I have learned over the last year and a half is that ‘we get thru together.’ You and Mike are a perfect example of that friend, an incredible example for all of us. One day at a time…we get thru together. Always here. Love you. XO
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Aunt Carol
11/16/2023 08:17:36 pm
You and Mike (and your momma too) are amazing. Like Kyle said, you get through together! The strength and courage you have together is so beautiful.
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Marie H
11/16/2023 08:51:28 pm
My heart breaks for you. Your courage and tenacity over the last thirteen years has been inspiring. I will continue to pray for you and keep you close to my heart. Hugs to you both and God Bless you.
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Patty Goonis
11/16/2023 10:05:34 pm
You are one strong warrior at the most vulnerable of times. Try not to focus on the what ifs and focus on what is; the enormous love ❤️ you have for others and the ❤️ they have for you. You are a shining beacon of light
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Helen
11/16/2023 10:10:42 pm
I am so devastated to read about this latest discovery but also somehow still feel confident that if anyone can make it through this- you can!! I also want to share that 6 years ago my baby brother- who is 50 but still my baby brother, had a seizure that led to the discovery of his brain tumor- they treated it, watched it, measured it and we were all but certain we had made it through when he has another seizure this past February. The tumor had grown and was larger than the initial size 6 years ago. I was so scared as surgery was really the only option but my little brother made it through & so far- so good. AND he has a badass scar!! All of this is to say I am pulling for you, people have survived brain tumors and come out the other side. I am here if you ever need anything! 💓
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Danielle and Delana
11/16/2023 10:10:43 pm
We love you Meghan and always have you and Mike in our prayers💞
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Mike B
11/16/2023 11:13:45 pm
Sending so much love. One day at a time. ❤️ ☘️ 👊🏻
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Meg McIntire
11/16/2023 11:49:15 pm
You probably wouldn’t approve what I really want to say since it’s mostly 4 letter words. I have followed you for so many years-when my brother was still alive and I was looking for some positive news to share with him, and before my own diagnosis a few short years later. I am mad, hopeful, heartbroken, disappointed, scared, and inspired. This is the post I never wanted to read. I have not commented before but I think of you often and check for your updates regularly. I pray for you and Mike, your pups, your families, and your wonderful doctors. I am sending love, faith, hope, and healing your way. XO, Meg
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Jenny Flanagan
11/17/2023 12:41:08 am
Meghan, I am so sorry about all that has happened described above. My heart was racing, twisting, crying the whole time. I am believing God to allow the treatments and radiation to work and get you stable again. I know you are worth more than a million children in Mike’s eyes too and neither of you deserve what cancer came to try to do. But so grateful for God’s grace and sustaining you and you and I am seeing you both as my dang heroes. And your mom Nurse Jan! Praising God for your medical team as well! Love always, Jenny
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Amanda
11/17/2023 12:41:41 am
Sending all the prayers and hugs. You continue to be a light and inspiration of strength. You got this! Xoxo
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Matt Wandrie
11/17/2023 05:56:03 am
Special prayers for both of you during this trying time. May Jesus and His angels watch over and protect you while you recover. Love to all!
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Jack Benson
11/17/2023 06:02:13 am
Love you!! Sending you all the good vibes and prayers for easier days ahead.
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Tonya
11/17/2023 06:51:49 am
One day at a time❤️
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Brian Tass
11/17/2023 06:58:03 am
My family and I send our love and prayers to you and Mike. If any Warrior can fight through this, it will be you.
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Nate Jolliff
11/17/2023 07:11:17 am
Meghan, you are loved by so many and admired by those who know you. I am inspired by your continued journey, determination, and passion for life. Rest assured you and your husband Mike are in my prayers. It is very difficult for many to fully understand what you must be going through. Keep being a badass, and know God's love surrounds you like a shield.
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Rebecca Fenlon
11/17/2023 07:56:12 am
Oh Megan, my heart breaks for you, thank God you and Mike are such warriors, keep fighting, John and I are praying for you daily as always and sending you nothing but love and light
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Julie Farhat
11/17/2023 08:04:52 am
I am sorry to hear about the brain tumor, but glad you have the option of trying gamma knife radiation before moving to a more invasive brain surgery. You are a warrior, Meghan. I know you didn’t choose this path, but your struggle is part of your strength and part of your story. However, it’s NOT your entire story. It’s also a love story about sometime who chose an amazing spouse and partner in life who loves her unconditionally. Someone who’s been a loving momma to her fur babies. Someone who was an advocate for her own health, did her research, and chose an amazing team of docs at Karmanos. This is a story about someone who nurtured her friendships and relationships with her family so she will never be alone. And also someone who worked hard to pursue a career in PT and is helping people by providing hope and healing every day. I am sorry we lost tough over the years, but I want you to know that I admire your courage and your ability to remain optimistic (no not all the time, that’s impossible) despite the hand you’ve been dealt. Much love!
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Sue & Mark Teggart
11/17/2023 09:45:43 am
Meghan,
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Jackie OShea
11/17/2023 10:13:49 am
Sending love and prayers to you Mike and your beautiful mother, So many prayers are being said for you. ❤️🙏🏻❤️
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Shannon Higdon
11/17/2023 12:32:24 pm
Dear Meghan, I’m so very sorry to hear of this brain tumor. I’m so sorry for this past anguishing week you and Mike have been through. I can’t even imagine the horror of it all. I’m praying our all powerful Lord and Savior will provide comfort during this time as you ramp up for your procedure. I know God is Sovereign over everything and as long as there is breath left in you there is hope🙏🙏 You have a powerful message of survival that helps so many! God’s got you in the palm of his hand. Praying for you daily, and I know God hears every pray from your prayer warriors. Love you, Mike and your beautiful mom and family❤️🙏❤️🙏
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Deb Hart
11/17/2023 02:43:22 pm
Hugs and extra prayers to you, Mike and your family.
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Chanell-BBB
11/17/2023 03:11:36 pm
STC,
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Lara
11/17/2023 07:29:07 pm
Meghan … you are incredible .. even in these moments. You have this beautiful rawness in each and every word. You are in our prayers always. Xo
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Matthew Drake
11/17/2023 09:29:08 pm
Love you my friend Meow Meow. You are in my thoughts and prayers during this most difficult time to you and Mike ❤️🙏💪👊
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Matt Topie
11/17/2023 11:46:30 pm
Thoughts and prayers from Arizona! Stay strong 💪
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Colleen DeDeckere
11/18/2023 12:00:12 pm
Meghan ~ as always, you and Mike are in my prayers. We’ve never met, but I have followed you and your story. Stay strong and believe in miracles. Where there is hope, there is faith. Where there is faith, miracles happen. 🙏🏻😘
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Liz
11/18/2023 12:06:05 pm
Your strength and grace in the face of all this continues to astound me Meg. I’m sending so much love to you and Mike. You got this! Xoxo
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Diane Daley
11/21/2023 06:18:08 pm
Becca let me know. While I keep you and Mike as well as your dear mom, brother and Doug in my prayers, I am requesting prayers left and right from my friends and prayer group.
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Tracy Adlington
11/21/2023 07:29:58 pm
I’m so so sorry you’re going through this! Your strength and support systems are absolutely incredible! Sending you so much love!
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Brian S.
11/23/2023 11:15:59 am
Meghan,
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