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I Swear, I Am Still Alive!

10/7/2015

26 Comments

 
Hey there long lost blog readers.  Man, it has sure been awhile.  In all actuality, this is really just a test to see who is still checking in on me.  If you read this, leave a comment and then I will know to bump you up in your ranking of people I love most.  haha, just kidding.  I truly can't believe how long it has been since my last post.  I remember writing my very first blog entry and commenting that I was going to pray for a time when my life would be too ordinary and boring to even write about and hoped the blog would be short lived.  Well, I can't necessarily say that life has been "ordinary" or boring either.  But I will say that as the months, and now YEARS have passed since my diagnosis, I am able to focus more of my time and energy on other aspects of my life besides cancer.  

I continue to have days or even weeks, where I might struggle a little more...whether it is due to joint pain from my medication, stress about a fellow survivor dealing with a recurrence, or saddness regarding the tough issues and ways this disease has affected Mike and I on a deeper level.  But, I have tried my best to work through these times on my own -or by talking it out with Mike or close friends.  I will admit that I continue to struggle with a great deal of survivors guilt after losing so many friends to this disease and so it has become difficult for me to log on to the blog and vent about the hard times I am facing.  I know those friends would give anything to have even one more "bad day" with the ones they love.  The logial part of my brain knows it's okay (and even healthy) to let these emotions out, but the emotional side of my brain tells me to try to suck it up and deal with it more privately rather than feeling pity from others or perhaps subconsciously seek pep talks through you all via the blog.  

We are all dealing with tough stuff in life.  I don't have a single friend or family member who isn't trying to cope with some aspect of stress, heartache or loss.  And although there have been many times where I let myself slip into the darkness of feeling like we constantly get hit blow after blow, worse than many people, I try to do my best to snap myself out of it and count my blessings instead.

On that note, if you are one of the incredible people who has been used to following my story through the blog but I don't know personally; you might not know that I had another round of scans last week and everything looks really good.  I am still stable with no new disease anywhere and it looks like this treatment has been working!  This is the second set of scans I have had since radiation in January due to my recurrence in my spine.  I have been dealing with some new side effects that started in June but nothing too serious or severe enough to make me reconsider this course of treatment.  If it is working...keep it coming!  

So, I just wanted to say a quick hello and remind you all that I am still here - plugging along as a wife, puppy momma, daughter, sister, friend, physical therapist and photographer.  I am staying way too busy and although I am often tired, I am thankful that being busy also means I am feeling well enough to pack too much on my plate. 

Thank you to all of you who continue to love me, support me and cheer me on - even when things seem calm and uneventful between scans - because truthfully, you may never know when I am struggling emotionally the most.  It comes and goes and seems to hit during the most unexpected times.  I promise to try to make more of an effort to show up on the blog more soon because I do think it is a healthy and cathartic practice for me and the love I receive in return is priceless. 

Happy Fall - my favorite time of the year!
xoxo, 
​Meg

ps - There have been so many great events and activities I have been fortunate to have been a part of this year.  I will definitely post more pics, info and videos soon but for now, here is a recent pic of Mike and I from my brother in-law Dan's wedding a couple weeks ago.  It was a gorgeous wedding in Charlevoix and we are so excited to welcome Amber into the family!  
Picture
26 Comments
Elizabeth
10/7/2015 09:55:40 pm

😉

Reply
Mom
10/8/2015 10:09:11 pm

You know I am here!!

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Doug
10/8/2015 10:10:10 pm

Love you, Meghan

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Brandi
10/9/2015 12:37:52 am

I'm here :) Your blog was SO helpful to me in the beginning, so I will always read it. Plus it let me connect to you personally! Love and hugs your way!

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helen
10/9/2015 01:56:45 am

Great to hear from you I worked with patty Labelle at the dmc Ander you at your fundraiser. I think the world of you and your support has been priceless. Thank you.

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Elizabeth Bedia
10/9/2015 09:26:42 am

I am so happy to hear you are busy and feeling well! Miss seeing you. Let's catch up soon. Love you Meghan!

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The Dunlops
10/12/2015 08:44:45 am

Sending lots of love, too, and always here for you!

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Christina Tischler
10/14/2015 04:33:36 am

Still checking on my american friends!! ;-) Glad to hear that evrything is allright! Sending lots of love over the ocean!

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laura m link
10/14/2015 09:37:31 am

I've been waiting for a blog update...Great news on the scans!

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Mary C
10/14/2015 07:44:51 pm

Always checking in on you my beautiful cousin. I'm thrilled you're finding everything stable and you're busy enjoying family, friends, work and photography. You are in my prayers every day. Love you!!

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Sarah Jelinek
10/16/2015 02:34:27 pm

Always thinking about you and Mike :) Great Picture, Great time!!

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Susan Thomas
10/20/2015 10:33:16 am

Dear Meghan,
I periodically have been checking your blog and so happy to hear that scans are clear and that you are happy and doing well. Your hair is georgeous!!! We think of you often and appreciate the update. You are an inspiration for all. You are absolutely right, everyone has "something", and the best I know is to keep hanging on to each other for love and support. We all send our best to you and to MIke and Mom. Thank you for allowing us to know and to love you.

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Linda B.
10/20/2015 05:17:15 pm

Still checking in. Happy to finally see an update! :-)

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Kathy Richgels (Melissa Richgels Dinslage mom)
10/21/2015 02:53:20 pm

Meghan, so happy for the excellent scan results.
Thoughts and prayers for all to continue to be well.
You did not ask for this...so inspiring where you are with it.

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Bob Hart
10/22/2015 04:49:02 pm

Nice to see another post from you. We are very happy that things are still stable, and that you are living life. So many people in your life care about you and those around you. We stay amazed by the continued inspiration you bring.

We think of you often. Love, Bob & Deb

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Melissa
10/26/2015 07:34:48 pm

Love you!!

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LauryB
10/29/2015 03:11:30 pm

I'm still praying for you, way out here in Huntington Beach, CA. You don't know me. I happened across your blog back in the beginning, 3 yrs ago and have followed you ever since. My sister and I have both had breast cancer. Nothing like what you have gone thru. So, I just wanted you to know that there are probably a lot of nameless, faceless people out there praying for you and hoping you never, never give up!

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Kiki
11/8/2015 02:19:25 pm

Keep doing what you're doing girl, love you! xoxo

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Jonah
11/11/2015 05:50:10 pm

Fall is Caseys favorite time of year as well! Glad to hear you are doing well Meghan. Say hi to Mike for me

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Patty
11/12/2015 09:59:16 pm

You post whenever you want and you say and do whatever you want-you are beyond amazing!!!! You inspire me so!!! Praying everyday for clear scans! I miss you! Dinner soon! XO!

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courtney ketchie
11/14/2015 08:46:11 pm

love you lady. you are beautiful inside and out. hugs to you and mike. i hope to see you soon. continuing to pray for you both

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Dave Taylor
12/7/2015 03:49:22 pm

Go Meghan! Love from the East side!

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colleen
12/13/2015 12:28:45 pm

Old friend of your mom's. I think of you and your wonderful spirit often. I must say that I am somewhat afraid to get the update, and I was pleased to see you are just too busy and 'normal'. Blessings to you and your family this Holiday season.

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Dan
12/19/2015 01:15:05 pm

Meghan,
Seeing this post makes me happy and gives me a sense of relief. I often wonder about the emotional side of it between hearing about the results of your scans. Also, that's a great photo of you and Mike!
Love,
Dan

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Jackie Szymanski
1/26/2016 10:46:31 am

I happened to think about you today and haven't gone on your blog in a long time. It sounds like things are going well for you. I know your life is so busy and how you managed to keep up amazes me. I am glad that things are going well since you haven't blogged in awhile. No news is good news.

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Kathy Richgels (Melissa Richgels Dinslage's mom)
10/14/2017 06:36:11 pm

Meghan,
So thrilled you are doing so well.
Savor and enjoy, don't ever waste energy feeling guilty.
You and your family are always in my prayers.
Warmest regards

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    My blog to keep you all 
    up  to date on how I am living this crazy, beautiful life while dealing with Stage IV breast cancer.


    The Cliffs Notes version of my life with breast cancer...I was diagnosed with Invasive Lobular Breast Cancer on March 23, 2011 just 2 days after turning 29 years old.  Shortly thereafter, we discovered the disease had spread to my spine, thus making it Stage IV, otherwise known as Metastatic Breast Cancer.  It's been a roller coaster of ups and downs ever since, but I'm just grateful to be here! 

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